No Face: Please Crit

dbdnath · 12-17-2003, 08:39 PM

There is something wrong with me,
I have no face for you to see,
Something’s clawing at my body,
Tearing away tearing away,
Can you help me find my face,
Or can you take me from this place,
These demons won’t leave me alone,
Could I have stopped it if I had known,

My mind was taken away from me,
My face was taken away for free,
My soul didn’t leave it was never there,
But my face is gone and it’s not fair,
You cannot see the way I feel,
You’ll never know how I feel for real,
But you can’t see my face no more,
And you cannot see my painful sore,

I am missing a part of me,
Why can’t you see, why can’t you see,
Something’s missing from my body,
Don’t feel like me, don’t feel like me,
Is it coming back again,
Is this the end, is this the end,
All I need is one true friend,
This is the end, this is the end,

This is the end and I’m all alone,
I lost everything I lost all I own,
There’s nothing left I have no face,
My life is gone it’s all erased,
There is no me the darkness has grown,
It seems it’s all I’ve ever known,
Not how to love just how to hate,
My face is gone and it feels like fate,

I look at the water there’s no reflection,
Without my face I seek affection,
For this new me is alone as well,
But I’m still here why can’t you tell,
Now I’ve changed we’ve grown apart
My life before was a work of art,
But its all gone now just like my face,
Just like one day I pressed erase,

My face is gone now it’s the end,
Now I understand, now I understand,
The old me is gone and so is my friend,
Their gone again, their gone again
My face did go It went for good,
Don’t think it should, don’t think it should
I would have changed it if I could,
You know I would, you know I would,

death_by_monkeys · 12-17-2003, 10:41 PM

nice work. its a bit of a depressing song but i like it

DCsicass · 12-18-2003, 02:25 AM

i love depressing songs they are deep and make you think, hell most of my S H I T is depressing anyway great song

My face is gone now it’s the end,
Now I understand, now I understand,
The old me is gone and so is my friend,
Their gone again, their gone again

great couple lines heyar
this in a great song, just seems it might be a bit too long though unless its a fast song,

DCsicass · 12-19-2003, 07:26 PM

how come no one else is replying to this great song

DCsicass · 12-20-2003, 05:01 PM

more people need to see this song

Nephren Ka · 12-20-2003, 07:26 PM

Man, its quite long. Perhaps in trying to make it that length some of the rhymes may feel a bit 'forced' like you felt you had to add them, but hey, its a kick-*** piece. Keep it up

sadisticmonkey · 12-20-2003, 07:45 PM

'can you help me find my face?'

i like everything BUT that line

DCsicass · 01-03-2005, 02:08 AM

here i still think people should see this song somemore

***morrissey*** · 01-03-2005, 02:37 AM

seriously, please stop bumping these old threads. Or I'll request that they be closed.

anti-centrist2 · 01-03-2005, 04:24 AM

im thankful to whoever bumped it cos its a really great song and i wouldnt have had the chance to read it if someone hadnt bumped it.

12-17-2003, 08:39 PM	#1
dbdnath Registered User Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 6	No Face: Please Crit There is something wrong with me, I have no face for you to see, Something’s clawing at my body, Tearing away tearing away, Can you help me find my face, Or can you take me from this place, These demons won’t leave me alone, Could I have stopped it if I had known, My mind was taken away from me, My face was taken away for free, My soul didn’t leave it was never there, But my face is gone and it’s not fair, You cannot see the way I feel, You’ll never know how I feel for real, But you can’t see my face no more, And you cannot see my painful sore, I am missing a part of me, Why can’t you see, why can’t you see, Something’s missing from my body, Don’t feel like me, don’t feel like me, Is it coming back again, Is this the end, is this the end, All I need is one true friend, This is the end, this is the end, This is the end and I’m all alone, I lost everything I lost all I own, There’s nothing left I have no face, My life is gone it’s all erased, There is no me the darkness has grown, It seems it’s all I’ve ever known, Not how to love just how to hate, My face is gone and it feels like fate, I look at the water there’s no reflection, Without my face I seek affection, For this new me is alone as well, But I’m still here why can’t you tell, Now I’ve changed we’ve grown apart My life before was a work of art, But its all gone now just like my face, Just like one day I pressed erase, My face is gone now it’s the end, Now I understand, now I understand, The old me is gone and so is my friend, Their gone again, their gone again My face did go It went for good, Don’t think it should, don’t think it should I would have changed it if I could, You know I would, you know I would,

01-03-2005, 02:37 AM	#9
*morrissey* Pictoral Pontification Supermod Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: I don't need luck Posts: 10,999	seriously, please stop bumping these old threads. Or I'll request that they be closed.
	Digging: Taylor Swift - Fearless

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12-17-2003, 10:41 PM	#2
death_by_monkeys death_by_monkeys Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: queensland australia Posts: 3	nice work. its a bit of a depressing song but i like it

12-18-2003, 02:25 AM	#3
DCsicass E'ville Bassist Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: ERMA New Jersey Posts: 343	i love depressing songs they are deep and make you think, hell most of my S H I T is depressing anyway great song My face is gone now it’s the end, Now I understand, now I understand, The old me is gone and so is my friend, Their gone again, their gone again great couple lines heyar this in a great song, just seems it might be a bit too long though unless its a fast song,

12-19-2003, 07:26 PM	#4
DCsicass E'ville Bassist Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: ERMA New Jersey Posts: 343	how come no one else is replying to this great song

12-20-2003, 05:01 PM	#5
DCsicass E'ville Bassist Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: ERMA New Jersey Posts: 343	more people need to see this song

12-20-2003, 07:26 PM	#6
Nephren Ka Registered User Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 1	Man, its quite long. Perhaps in trying to make it that length some of the rhymes may feel a bit 'forced' like you felt you had to add them, but hey, its a kick-*** piece. Keep it up

12-20-2003, 07:45 PM	#7
sadisticmonkey Rrrronkey Conkey CONK! Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: In your soup! Posts: 6,785	'can you help me find my face?' i like everything BUT that line

01-03-2005, 02:08 AM	#8
DCsicass E'ville Bassist Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: ERMA New Jersey Posts: 343	here i still think people should see this song somemore

01-03-2005, 04:24 AM	#10
anti-centrist2 Banned Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 21	im thankful to whoever bumped it cos its a really great song and i wouldnt have had the chance to read it if someone hadnt bumped it.