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Old 11-19-2012, 06:32 PM   #1
Leeroidz187
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Upset ANIMAL ABUSER (eyewitness acount)

THE abuser. (about my neighbor and dog)

Hes getting Fat,Looking like his bout to explode
The boy aint been out his Yard an he don’t fit in his clothes
Living large but this boys still living in prison
Hes Got a big house like nothing you can envision
He Has a father he knows he has to call his master
If he doesn’t get away I know He’ll die much faster

Abused taunted and his made to feel sick
I hope this dirty fucking master burns in hell for this shit
Rare visits..,,, but you know its hardly enough
to keep a young boy sane Who’s really do it tough.
Left alone in the rain to watch his old friend die
I only watched from a distance with a tear in my eye.

Controlled by violence, abuse loud noises and fear
There is nothing on the airwaves his big ears couldn’t hear
SO where’s the love after all his breed has more than can count
Instead the master only dished out hatred in large amounts
He lays starring through a fence at what could be a nice walk
They’d still be mans best friend even if they could talk.

Last edited by Leeroidz187; 11-19-2012 at 06:36 PM. Reason: title edit
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Old 11-20-2012, 12:09 AM   #2
Daily Routine
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welcome to the forum, leeroidz

good stuff
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Old 11-22-2012, 10:18 AM   #3
kitsch
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lol
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Old 01-24-2013, 08:14 AM   #4
thetaoshum
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Maybe I like my poetry and lyrics to not just punch me in the face with what they are about but it seems to me like you just wrote about an event that happened instead of making it sound interesting. It seems more like you are writing for a newspaper column that lets you rhyme your words. This is a good topic to write about but just work on it more. Take out unnecessary words and phrases, fill your words with more than their obvious meanings and what really helps is say it out loud a few times so you know how people will read it and what the cadence is actually like. Don't stop writing
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