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it was hard to imagine alternate picking for me one day, i couldnt do it if my life depended on it for my first 2-3 months of playing... then i just started doing it slowly and relearned how to pick and eventually it has become second nature
give it time and dont get frustrated so easy
as for barring id just try not to strain it too hard as you only need to put so much pressure on the fretboard for the notes to hold. i dont know what is considered proper technique when barring chords like that with the pinky but the way i do it is basically the same as with all my fingers, keep it straight and relaxed with only enough pressure to keep the strings from buzzing
you could also use your ring finger as kind of a support when using yoru pinky to bar and kinda rest it ontop of it and press down...
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