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Old 07-19-2004, 09:36 AM   #9
Maggotfelon420
Wanted:God-Dead or Alive
 
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 159
"Everything stopped, as I would have given everything to have ended our strife."
---This line didn't seem to flow too well. Maybe you could shorten it by a few words.

"The answer to our vendetta has come.
Not in a flush of wine but a gush of blood.
Here's your futile apology unveiled.
Eyes where the seas of sorrow sailed."
---I really liked this part.

Overall this is probably, IMO a 8.5/10 or somewhere in there. You made a good song out of a horrible situation. I hope it helped get some of the sh.it off of your chest.

Do me a fav and check out either of my songs:
Under the Lake
Untitled/spur of the moment crap

I won't let them leave the front page. So you shouldn't have to search for em.
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