Cable tv
 

I rarely watch cable tv. But when I do, I realize how fortunate I am not to cable tv.

If you want cable, here are your choices:

Basic IQ reducing mind-numbing package: 20 channels

Extra mind-altering, IQ reducing package: 80 channels.

For people whose IQ is not being reduced quickly enough, there's HBO.

What is it about the 80s? It sems like everything on tv was reverse, like it was depicting an alternate reality.

"The Cosby Show"

About a black family led by Clifford Huxtable, a gynecologist, and Claire, his wife, an attorney. Oh right, when was a black family ever ran by two doctors?

"Married With Children"

About a degenerate white family. The father Al, a shoe salesman (get that! The sick bastards that wrote this made him the worst thing they could imagine), is a total failure, an incompetent lover and comes home and sits in front of the tv drunk with his hand in his pants. The mother, well you get the picture. The daughter is a slut, the son is a straight F student. The only one who has anything going for him is the dog. (White people are worse than dogs!)

Here's reality. "Clifford Huxtable", real name Bill Cosby, was a bit of a gynecologist if you will. He drugged women and then molested their vaginas. Oh yeah. Didn't you know that in teaching hospitals on OBGYN ward's they often give the young aspiring doctors a look at the patient's vaginas and touch them, open themup, et cetera? Don't believe me? Tel me how many women volunteer to be an object for 22-25 year old men and women to experiment on... zero. That's why they do it when a woman is under a general, so she will never even know!

And Al Bundy is really a elite Northeastern stooge. That guy was such a trustfunder that I bet he competed in dressage and equine sports.

In short, the 80s got it backwards. It was actually the black dad who was absent from his family while out raping women, while the white man was busy raising a totally normal family and making a marriage work.

Now I know what you will say

Oh, Volumnius! You sick man! You made all these things up, you have perverted fantasies about doctors molesting their patients!

[url]http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=125094[/url]

Read it and weep bitches. Why would I make something up when I can go read it in a newspaper. The truth is stranger than fiction. Stop and think about it. What normal woman would let a class of thirty 22-25 year old men and women stick fingers in her vagina so they can become doctors? Zero, nada. The only way to do it is when a woman is under general. "Uh, hey Dr. Stephens, can we borrow your patient a minute? We're on the vagina chapter and I need a body."

The commercials have gotten so long compared to when I was a kid, I sometimes thinks I'm watching an infomercial! "Goodness gracious, I must have hit a button and changed the channel!" Then feverishly flipping to find what channel I was on, and with the attention span of a goldfish, I forget what I was doing and seeing something else interesting and watch it instead. Thirty minutes later I remember what I was trying to find, I go back to the channel and am back in time to see the ending. Not bad, I saw the beginning and the end and cut out all the shit in the middle.

Damn

[IMG]https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/2288186755/Tl_dr.jpg[/IMG]

Better to live in denial than to admit what was seen can't be unseen.

Dude. I'll sit here and fucking tolerate you all day every day for a thousand years, about anything but you NEVER FUCKING DISRESPECT AL BUNDY MOTHERFUCKER!

Why, you see part of yourself in him and by extension, you feel like I'm calling you a failure?

Well, truth being, it's all a show. If you were actually a shoe salesman I wouldn't look down on you at all. Have you ever operated a Hanson device for measuring foot length and girth? I remember when they would come out, size your foot, help you find a shoe, carefully remove the paper, hand you the shoe. It was an art form. But with the McDonaldization of the shoe market, now, no more, nada.

The fondness of bygone eras, the "good old days". But were they really that good, I'm not so sure they were. But that made you feel so special when they helped you with the shoes.

Here's what I say: Trashman? We need a trashman. Heck, the Trashman is as indispensable as the politician, probably more so. We could live with fewer politicians but we need people to pick up the trash. I don't care what you do. It's about a service, are you making lives better. That's all that matters.

No he's fucking hilarious and that show is my childhood. Plus Christina Applegate was responsible for my first time jerkin.

Oh and I forgot Roseanne, another degenerate white family from a manufacturing town the Jews in Hollywood can make fun of.

Christina Applegate, more not Christina Applenot.

I think it was Marshall McLuhan, who wrote The Medium is the Message, who said that television is not about selling products to viewers, it's about selling viewers to advertisers. It sure seems that way.