Flower of the Far North

[BobJoHankins]

made in the shadow
praying for a setting sun

Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey
Ride into Oblivion
With hope on their side

The Only Ruin of The Young
Why
Its so easy
Words over a Fire
The Secret of Our World
On my knees
You're My

The Fortune Teller sleeps in peace
Salvation through The Wail
Ride Into Paradise
With Satan's Wife on his side

And The Gods threw down (3x)


you have
you are

Flower of The Far North

The Coyote's pack of lies
Why
For so long
A Call in the Black Night
Standing Tall
You are the

And The Gods threw down (3x)

You have
You are

The Flower of The Far North


---------------------------------------------------------------
EDIT:it was supposed to be anything that wasn't a complete sentence or idea ends with the title. Ex: You Are (The Flower of The Far North) or And The Gods threw down (The Flower of The Far North)

[DeadReligion]

This makes no sense, at all.

Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey
Ride into Oblivion
With hope on their side
^ This was great. The rest was pointless, and a bother to read. What are you saying in this piece?

[cholocharlie]

interesting, but it is really hard to understand what youre trying to say. I cant really imagine it being a real song tho,but I guess it really depends on what youre going for, whether it be poetry or music or both.

[camdizzle]

I don't get it :/

[asher2658]

Well ummm i don't get it.....it looks like u looked for random words that sounded cool and slaped :smash: them onto a piece of paper.

"Stars are feeling the moment"
...what? :confused:

"With hope on their side"
...Who's side.

"The Secret of Our World
On my knees
You're My"
...You're my what?

so yea it needs work.

[BobJoHankins]

the only way to make it clearer would be to change the piece, hmm. ****.
thanks for the feedback

[cholocharlie]

that edit makes it a little clearer but its hard to tell exactly what the song is about. make it have a clearer meaning next time around.

[asher2658]

ok so to me it looks like you took a few lines that looked cool and slapped them onto a word document.
"Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey"
....uhhhh what do starts have 2 do with whiskey

"On my knees
You're My"
...my what.....mine?


this looks like a hardcore song in the making....ahahah

"Time is a big one
Only have to free us all"
-The Melvins (Lizzy)

ahhahahahha

[asher2658]

ok so this looks like u took a few cool sounding lines and slapped them onto a word document....

"Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey"
....what does stars have to do with whiskey

"On my knees
You're My"
....my what...mine?


well its a hardcore song in the making...ahhahahah

"Elvis had a daughter
Not half-boned siksura"
-The Melvins (Lizzy)

[asher2658]

ok so this looks like u took a few cool sounding lines and slapped:smash: them onto a word d0cument....

"Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey"
....what does stars have to do with whiskey

"On my knees
You're My"
....my what...mine?


well its a hardcore song in the making...ahhahahah

"Elvis had a daughter
Not half-boned siksura"
-The Melvins (Lizzy)

[cholocharlie]

ya next time you write lyrics you should focus on them making more sense and having a real purpose and meaning.

[BobJoHankins]

they do have a real meaning, but as i see its rather hard to see

[asher2658]

Ok so if you ask me it looks like you took a bunch of cool sounding words and slapped them onto a word document.

"Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey"
....what do stars have to do with whiskey

"The Secret of Our World
On my knees
You're My"
...my what..mine?


well its a hardcore song in the making....

"Elvis had a daughter
Not half-boned siksura

Heavy Betty big bone
Little kitty fig bomb
I'm no feet less
Keep me one

Eat more with your collar
Call egg mig mig me in May"
-The Melvins (Lizzy)

[BobJoHankins]

Ok so if you ask me it looks like you took a bunch of cool sounding words and slapped them onto a word d0cument.

"Stars are feeling the moment
Drinking my whiskey"
....what do stars have to do with whiskey

"The Secret of Our World
On my knees
You're My"
...my what..mine?

(Lizzy)

ok, you took it way too literally.

Stars representing our heroes, those we look up too, the good guys can always cave into something like peer pressure or mood swing and "drink your whiskey" meaning fog their judgement even more by your good or bad qualities.

as for your second comment i would like you to read my edit to my thing as i thought people would actually read it but obviously people aren't.

[asher2658]

The drinking my whisky thing is way to confusing, its deep but no one sees that. Mabey you should make it more simple....

[mullets suk]

you have some good things going. the first stanza is really great. the rest of it...not so much. going in to the parts of "and the gods threw down" is really choppy ad makes the piece a pain in the *** to read, cause (at lest I) have go back and be like wtf... did i miss something.

"The Only Ruin of The Young
Why
Its so easy
Words over a Fire
The Secret of Our World
On my knees
You're My"

first line isnt grammatically correct...thus choppy and hard to read. if you made it regular english (they only ruin the young) it would sound alot better imo. the last line doesnt need to be there it serves no point to the rest of the stanza. again a great part.


"The Coyote's pack of lies
Why
For so long
A Call in the Black Night
Standing Tall
You are the

And The Gods threw down..."

again great lines, but the
"you are the gods...
And The Gods threw down"
is doesn't sound right and its just annoying really, to read

[BobJoHankins]

first line isnt grammatically correct...thus choppy and hard to read. if you made it regular english (they only ruin the young) it would sound alot better imo.

no its supposed to be like that.
The Only Ruin of The Young, which is supposed to be Love

[JaXAttacks]

what i get from this is as so: (cheesy i know :])

i feel like this is a short story of someone who is/feels outcasted
who frequently tries to escape reality while, at the same time, is attracted to the darker parts of reality
who dreams while awake
who relishes in the darkest of moments
while finally realizing that what he tries to escape from is the salvation from his current state of being
which, funnily, is not what he wants at all

or maybe i'm just seeing what i want to. :thumb:

[BobJoHankins]

almost got it.

hes not outcasted

It is the "darker parts of reality" he is attracted to, symbolized by the Flower of the Far North, but its not a general term, but a single object that in turn represents it. Hes attracted (in love?) to the Flower, (which can be anything you want it to be) which in turn is the opposite of what he stands for, wants, etc.

i read that and its more confusing than the original work, but w/e

oh and thanks someone who actually thinks it has meaning, and came very close to it. That outcasted part was certainly what you wanted to see however.