Nameless short song/poem

[peaveyrules]

"What's so good about the ability to hear?"
Says the 3 little blind mice as they drift away from their fears
It's easier to see themselves for who they are now,
Than to take for granted what they used to see in the mirror

And they claimed their love was true after every chemical they smoked
But she had long since grown tired of burning on the end of their filters
And being their incurable choke

This is the furthest away from anybody I've ever felt.

-----

A little piece I put together for one of my classes. Let me know what you think! crit4crit

Thanks guys

[liz123]

It reads a little too much like a story rather than a poem or lyrics. Many words aren't needed, making it drag a little and thus, the flow is uneven. Overall, I like the idea and how the verses link together. I especially like the last sentence for some reason. :)