"This is Love"

[Seafroggys]

This is a lame love song that I wrote for one of my old gf's in high school. I looked back on the lyrics for the first time in a long time, and I actually thought they were pretty decent (for a cheezy love song).

I'll post them here and wait for the eventual flamage of its awfulness :)

Love was a foreign concept
It made no sense to me
I had always had to pay it in debt
I never gave it free

There came a time when I understood it (oh oh yeah)
I met someone, you; I always loved you.... (always loved you)

This is Love!
People say it isn't, for we are young.
To hell with them all, its Love!
Love isn't for the best gun!

We dodged, we delt, we faced flak
More flak than any pilot faced
Why are they trying to beat us back?
We're together and embraced.

There was a time when we almost fell apart (oh oh no)
But love is the strongest bond, and I always loved you (always loved you)

This is Love!
People say it isn't, for we are young.
To hell with them all, its Love!
Love isn't for the best gun!

Love is what I have
It makes sense to me
I will always with you laugh
I always give it free

My love to you is free!
This is love!

[TojesDolan]

It's not that bad. But the theme is cliché.

The exclamation marks aid a bunch.

[Surf]

i got a real beatles feel from the lyrics, like you've tried to keep it simple, and somewhat catchy.

however, there's some awkward sounding lines that hinder this. try expressing yourself without so many connectives/pronouns/unnecessary words, and it'll sound alot better. also, try and use line breaks more to your advantage, and take them beyond simply end of sentence/end of line structure. the last problem i had waswith all the gun references. it doesn't seem like a protest song, so i really can't understand the repeated references. it doesn't sit well with the nice happy love theme.

[Seafroggys]

heh, the gun was a bad attempt at a rhyme. I remember my g/f said it was funky, and didn't really fit :p I guess it don't.

I am completely honored by having it seem like a Beatles song, they are my favorite band!