"Trapped"

[usuck]

"Trapped"

Chorus:
locked in a bottle
but I'm no genie
I am a prisoner
why do you keep me here?
don't you know I'm claustrophobic?
or do you just not care?

Verse 1:
I never would have trusted you
if you had let me know the real you
but you let me get to know
a person who doesn't exist
and you tricked me into believing this lie
but now I know
I know, and when I finally free myself from you
you won't go unpunished

Chorus

Verse 2:
locked in this cell
no one wants to visit me
because of you
I blame it all on you,
even though it's partly my fault too
is that really lieing,
or just "bending the truth"?
like when you pretended you were being you

Chorus

Verse 3:
so I finally escape
your cold, cruel world
and now I'll never miss you
but I can never trust anyone more than just a little
and it's all because of you

Chorus

[Leftovers]

I'm totally new at this of criticising lyrics, but i'm willing to give you my extremely humble opinion, and me being a Spanish-speaking i asume my opinion won't be redundant.

Chorus:
locked in a bottle
but I'm no genie
I am a prisoner
why do you keep me here?
don't you know I'm claustrophobic?
or do you just not care?

< I think is a nice chorus, but I would supress the constant questions, I mean, there are many other ways to make it sound better. You could state that your a claustrophobic, not asking, and asking. The flow is pretty good, though i don't quite catch the sense. I mean, if the keep you in a bottle I would asume they don't give a **** about you >

I never would have trusted you
if you had let me know the real you
but you let me get to know
a person who doesn't exist
and you tricked me into believing this lie
but now I know
I know, and when I finally free myself from you
you won't go unpunished

< Way too many "you", you're like forcing the rhyme. I like the ending, but it doesn't rhyme, and even though it doesn't have to, you could supress the rhyme at the ending of the 2nd verse, to follow like a pattern. You left the rhyme a side after the 2 first lines... you coul give the same idea with other words >

locked in this cell
no one wants to visit me
because of you
I blame it all on you,
even though it's partly my fault too
is that really lieing,
or just "bending the truth"?
like when you pretended you were being you

< It sounds like a riddle and though i don't quite catch the main idea, i undestand where you wher trying to goo. you could also change some of the rhyming, not always "you", "too" and stuff like that. I read it at loud and didn't see to much of a flow... you should work on that>

From 1 to 10 i'll give you a 6, i did't quite like it but the idea of the whole lyric was good.

Hope to be of some help