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DeadReligion
01-20-2006, 08:26 PM
Lacerated Nirvana/The King Of Nirvana

(Verse 1)
This cyclical redundancy, I guess its life.
The emptiness fazed the gray haze, that gazed menacingly at the sky.
What is this, the overly dense blood on my hands, viscous, it drips.

Consecration; all your holy eyes, couldn’t hold a steady gaze.
All your calloused hands couldn’t hold me down.

(Verse 2)
There is a copacetic threat, in this white thread.
It could wrap around your small, half-bald head.
Be careful of the crux, that wields that bloodied man.
Death, is a contagious disease. There is no out, of becoming vacant and empty-eyed.

Suffocated, by all-knowing eyes, blinded by white dust,
Dust from the heavens, and those eyes that scathe your unrighteous body.
Rapists, and killers, are the mirrored image of this King Of Nirvana.

(Outro)
Finally, the lacerations struck the face of Nirvana, I stare at the devout in joviality.
Once they realize that heaven is hopeless...tragic despondence.
The priest, laughs away, with his riches in hand.

dyuaru
01-20-2006, 08:47 PM
Nice way to express your feelings on life without using lines like "it's all over for us". Sounds kinda like a your explaining life to the world and the wording is pretty good too. I especially like the king of nirvana bit and adds a twist of interest to the song. Difficult for me to analyze each line individually since I'm not good with this style of writing but I'll give it 8.5/10

A_Perfect_Sonnet
01-20-2006, 08:56 PM
I went through a big words phase too. Black dawtd.