Prison Break/Shellshock/The Ripper

[Rock_Out_Dudes]

Here's some lyrics I would like to have critiqued. Please leave me a link to your lyrics if you want me to crit yours, and i'd be happy to do so :). thanks

Here it is:

Prison Break (thrash):

Tonights the night, all signs point "go!"
Time to break away, time to be free
Been trapped inside these walls so long
Can't stand the sight, can't stand to see
These cement blocks, one moment more
I've got to get away
Let loose the project I undertook
Time for me to be me...free!

Sirens wail they know I'm gone
I see the gate, I have the key
All I need is to reach the gate
Turn the key, Turn to free
30 to early and I can tell
This isn't how it's supposed to go
Scopes and barrels follow me
I need to run, to be me...free!

It's time for some self-generated parole!

Take him (Take him)
Shoot him (Shoot him)
Kill him (Kill him)
Execute him (Execution)

Let none escape (none will escape)
Not one shall live (no one lives)
This is the end (this is the end)
They all die here (you will die here)
You will die between these four walls

Take him (Take him)
Shoot him (Shoot him)
Kill him (Kill him)
Execute him (Execution)
Prison Break

Thanks, and please leave a link for me so i can crit your stuff in return for you critiqueing mine.

[FA]

1 song a day mate..

[TojesDolan]

One song per day. Erase two and I might check this post out.

P.S. Read the rules.

[Rock_Out_Dudes]

Sorry, I deleted 2

[Rock_Out_Dudes]

One song per day. Erase two and I might check this post out.

P.S. Read the rules.

Yeah sorry about that, I read them like a year and a half ago when I first joined...I'll have to go back and reread, because I obviously forgot them.