Song meant for a Concept band (No name)

[TMA]

Scream for me
Make my ears bleed
And wake me from this dream
That plays out like a movie scene
Scream loud
If you don't, I can't hear
Your words of hope, your words of fear
Silence equals casualties
But you sweet voice will help bring ease

Reaper man, oh Reaper man
Please, spare my life
You don't want my blood of innocence
Running down your knife
Reaper man, sweet Reaper man
Please, I'm not done
Please don't suck my love down in
Through the barrel of your gun
Run

Scream for me
Make this whole world see
The end is far away
So long as you live through today
Scream loud
If you don't, I won't hear
Your words of hope, your words my dear
Silence is the only sound
That sets us six feet underground

Reaper man, oh Reaper man
Please, spare my life
You don't need my blood of innocence
Running down your knife
Reaper man, sweet Reaper man
Please, I'm not done
Please don't suck my love down in
Through the barrel of your gun
Run

Run loud, scream fast
And ignore my cries
No time to tell me
Your sweet goodbyes
One last childish game
Of Hide and Seek
Run loud, Scream fast
And warn them all
The beast behind
Stands bright and tall
One last chance to live
One final week

Reaper man, oh Reaper man
Please, spare my life
I won't have my blood of innocence
Running down your knife
Reaper man, sweet Reaper man
I told you, I'm not done
The whole world lays
Withing my hands

Run (Ignore my cries. No time for you sweet goodbyes)
Run (Ignore my cries. No time to witness our demise)


So... what do you think. And if you skipped pieces like the last chorus because you thought it was the same, I did add variations to it, so please take that into account. Nither the song nor the band I want to start so I can play this ( :naughty: Anybody have any interest?) have a name yet. Any ideas for the song name?

[emo=elmow/otheL]

First off. Come up with your own **** name. You did an excellent job on the song, you should be able to come up with a lovely name. I really like it. Has kind of a classic rock vibe. Dont know why. I would be more specific but I'm tired as hell and need to go o;;;ilei0f9]EFEIP]OK]GHBV.......OH!!! Before I die, what is the concept of the band supposed to be?

Anyway, try and take a look at mine. Ive got like 4 posted or something.

[TMA]

First off. Come up with your own **** name. You did an excellent job on the song, you should be able to come up with a lovely name. I really like it. Has kind of a classic rock vibe. Dont know why. I would be more specific but I'm tired as hell and need to go o;;;ilei0f9]EFEIP]OK]GHBV.......OH!!! Before I die, what is the concept of the band supposed to be?

Anyway, try and take a look at mine. Ive got like 4 posted or something.
Well, I am trying to work on the name, I'm just having serious problems with it.
It's great to hear that somebody likes the song at least. Thanks. I really enjoy hearing that.
And, I'm a serious Coheed And Cambria junkie, so it's all a scifi story. I'm still in the process of all the details of it, but the basic idea of THIS song is a person who has capabilities of destroying the world (unwillingly, though) is telling somebody close to him (maybe a girlfriend of a sybiling or something) to warn everyone and to try to stop him in whatever way is possible. In the lyrics, the character which I speak of is the one refered to as Reaper Man, as to say that he is the bringer of death.

[TMA]

I would really appreciate more crit on this.
Anybody?

[StrangelyBrewed13]

I really like the song. It oozes with angst wich makes it a real pleasure to read. I usually judge a song on wheter I actually enjoyed reading and this one of the few that actually did it for me. It had good imagery and nice ryhmes. Id like to find the name. Heres mine http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=367799

[islamicbob5342]

Definitely an interesting song with an interesting theme. I like the idea of the "reaper man" pretty much demanding that everybody beg for their life. It's different and therefore interesting. If your looking for a simple-drawn from the song name you should call it "Silence Equals Casualties" because that's a cool line that kind of sums up the piece pretty well. The only slight negative I see is that it does almost feel like too much rhyming off the bat with 4 in a row- I like your chorus rhyme better when you rhyme innocence with love down in (sort of) but not gun with knife. Also I'm not sure the song has a great natural flow to it, but then again I'd have to hear the song to know that.

By the way my song is here if you want to be a pal and check it out:
http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=367383

[Rise Me Up]

I say name it Ignore my Cries ,but that's just me.

[islamicbob5342]

Yeah that works too... but mine was better.

[TMA]

Hey guys, thanks a lot for the feedback. This is a project I really want to do, but I wanted to be sure that there would be SOMEBODY out there who would take some interest in listening to it. Thank you so much. It's going to keep me writing for a while, now knowing this.
Come on, bitches! More feedback is always welcome!

[forgotton fire]

very, very nice. it kinda reminds me of some of my other stuff that i'll be posting within the next few days. the wording and imagery is fantastic. the story behind the song is also great. 9.5/10
you can crit mine at
http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=368561

[TMA]

Well, I like hearing that most of you think I can produce a good image with my words. It's a very good thing to know.

[TMA]

Anymore?