Peace, listen if you'd like

[llama1600]

Alright, this was more or less written in response to the terrorist attacks in london i guess, but seems to make more sense in a 9/11 type of setting. whatver. It's a slow acoustic tune, and my voice is terrible, but i can't help it.

http://s45.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0ASON9M96U0JK1GPLDHMTWAJAF

i don't know how much longer the link is good, and the tag on the mp3 has been fixed, sorry if i offended anybody with my "immature attempt to be funny". oh yeah, it's also a work in progress, so any feedback would be appreciated.

[Charlie N. Sane]

The recording quality was really bad, but I guess that you knew that already.

the Good-
Nice guitar.
It wasn't very long. Sometimes these type of songs can go on for a very long time. You ended it at the right time.
It was a song with a message.

The not so good.
-You sang that in monotone. I know you're trying to be dylanesque or something. But even he used notes and inflection (even if he was off key). I think that you probably have some good pipes, but you sound really timid. That doesn't really go with a song as angry as this. Listen to some Tim Buckley. You'll see what I mean about having a little more energy in acoustic music.

All in all, it's a good start. I think that the song is promising. :)

[Charlie N. Sane]

Dude, Holy Hell!!!!

I just realized the title of your song! I live in Utah and attend the University of Utah! I will not allow you to perpetuate such a stereotype!

I take back everything nice I ever said about your song. ;)

[llama1600]

haha, i'm sorry, i actually think that's the title of another song and i stole it, the tag on that is completely wrong, i just typed in whatever popped into my head.

i actually wasn't really trying to sound like Dylan, i just have a fear of things that record my voice, because it isn't very good, and it usually gets worse when i record things. and yes i know the sound quality was terrible, i used a computer mic to record it.

thanks for listening

[Local_Skater]

Wtf? I can appreciate that your song has a meaningful subject matter, but noone will care with how you composed it. First off, "Utah: The Armpit of the US", sounds like an attempt to be funny, but is just very immature, takes away from the message you're trying to send, and the seriousness of the song as a whole. Moving on...not to be harsh or anything, but I think the vocals must be a joke. You sound like that guy from Big Cojones, except you are being serious. Sing less nasally, and develop some range. The guitar was ok, except it was very generic and boring to listen to. It'll take a lot of work to save this song, but it can be done.

[llama1600]

okay i fixed the tag, i seriously wasn't trying to offend anyone or be funny, it was late at night and that was the first thing i could think of which like i said, was stolen from somebody else.

[Charlie N. Sane]

Well, uh, I really wasn't offended. I was only joking around. :)

[llama1600]

my last post was directed more towards Local_Skater who seems to be freaking out. i kinda figured you were just joking around because of the way you worded the post and everything (the wink helped too).