Let Me Tend 2 U (Underneath Your Cream)

[HypnotiQSorcerer]

i wrote this one last night, was inspired by a girl, who came by my place
that i really really really wanted too... you know
its a first draft ... so be gentle lol
Crit for crit

Let Me Tend 2 U (underneath your cream)

(Verse 1)
Laying on your headrest
let me lay your body down
hypnotize you with this groove
as we'll roll around the ground (roll around)

(Verse 2)
Let my little finger
intrude your savoir-faire
rose petals and dirty moans
undulating motions and stares

(Hook 1)
Just let it Flow (Flow)
with this sensual groove
keep you screaming (cumming) higher
just let me tend to you

(hook 2)
for a touch a moan a kiss
from your head down to your feet
let me tend to you
i'll be your fantasy
Underneath your cream...

Underneath your cream...
Just let me tend to you...

(Verse 3)
the sweet sensation of my temptation
your sweat rolls down my tongue
let me lick(kiss) your body
like time has just begun

(Verse 3)
for I am adam, you are eve
forever inbetween
the lover and the loved underneath
heaven and your cream...

(Hook 1)
Just let it Flow (Flow)
with this sensual groove
keep you screaming (cumming) higher
just let me tend to you

(hook 2)
for a touch a moan a kiss
from your head down to your feet
let me tend to you
i'll be your fantasy
Underneath your cream....

underneath your cream
Just let me tend to you...

(verse 5)
So can i be? (Be Be)
Underneath your cream?
and set your body on fire
can you feel your scream?

(verse 6)
Laying on your headrest
silently moving my hips
forever inbetween
your thighs...your lips

(Hook 1)
Just let it Flow (Flow)
with this sensual groove
keep you screaming (cumming) higher higher
just let me tend to you

(hook 2)
for a touch a moan a kiss
from your head down to your feet
let me tend to you
i'll be your fantasy
underneath your cream....

underneath your cream
Just let me tend to you...

let me tend to you...
(repeat)

[BoozeMonkey]

Well it sure beats every Motley Crue song I've ever heard!

(Verse 2)
Let my little finger
intrude your savoir-faire
rose petals and dirty moans
undulating motions and stares

(Hook 1)
Just let it Flow (Flow)
with this sensual groove
keep you screaming (cumming) higher
just let me tend to you

^^^ My favorite parts of the song. "Sensual groove", I liked that a lot I know exactly what you're talking about. "Rose petals and dirty moans", that was awesome. And "keep you screaming (cumming) higher"... you almost started to get me horny :lol:

I didn't really understand the "underneath your cream" parts though. Not sure exactly what you meant there...

But all in all it was pretty good. I usually wouldn't like a poem about sex but this was tasteful, artistic, and elegant. I liked it :thumb:

[HypnotiQSorcerer]

Well it sure beats every Motley Crue song I've ever heard!

(Verse 2)
Let my little finger
intrude your savoir-faire
rose petals and dirty moans
undulating motions and stares

(Hook 1)
Just let it Flow (Flow)
with this sensual groove
keep you screaming (cumming) higher
just let me tend to you

^^^ My favorite parts of the song. "Sensual groove", I liked that a lot I know exactly what you're talking about. "Rose petals and dirty moans", that was awesome. And "keep you screaming (cumming) higher"... you almost started to get me horny :lol:

I didn't really understand the "underneath your cream" parts though. Not sure exactly what you meant there...

But all in all it was pretty good. I usually wouldn't like a poem about sex but this was tasteful, artistic, and elegant. I liked it :thumb:

hehe Underneath your cream is a term that politely described a females
sexual juices or secretions
lol i "Borrowed" the term from a prince song called "Underneath the cream"

basically changing the "The" into a "Your" technically making it mines lol


im glad you liked it, thanks alot!

[spnj]

oh quite the naughty little song you have here but well done none the less. I've read so many songs that deal with the same kind of thing but are so vulgar and obscene there is no point reading it. This is good.

I also ejoyed those above mentioned parts, because we know what you mean but you dont say it too strongly

well done!

[StrangelyBrewed13]

its really cool how you managed to go a little bit further than how that song could have been written which is total ****. i liked it but not because of what you think it might be but because you just displayed your emotions.

[HypnotiQSorcerer]

wow thank you,
i didn't think it was going to do this well especially for a first draft

[BrokenSaint]

was this meant to be funny? It seems so to me. IT's great for a laugh, but if it were a song it would have to be sung by Marvin Gaye.

[HypnotiQSorcerer]

i guess thats a compliment
since i dabble mostly in Smooth RnB anywayz...
thanks for the comment

[Corupt2057]

yeah you would definitely have to take this in the soft RnB realm for it to work
I think a sound like Avant - Makin' Good Love will work well for this
anyways take out the "little finger" doesn't say much for your manhood and honestly it'll make anyone laugh as for the underneath your cream.. I still think it's funny and a little sick but I think you could say it in a different way that would make this more subtle and more moody to where people will actually relate with it rather than laugh at it
crit back Cloud Shackles or I am one, Who am I?

[HypnotiQSorcerer]

thanx guys

your comments are noted
you def have to take this song with a slow groove
but i can't leave it completely smooth RnB i'll add an electric guitar riff somewhere lol