Voodoo Doll

[Gofix]

Verse 1:
I feel like i'm one of those people,
Who people like to use,
It makes me feel real feeble,
When i'm slammed down and abused,

Chorus:
Cause I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

But I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

Verse 2:
Deeper and deeper the wounds scar inside,
I wanna escape but i don't know how to,
Evernight and everyday i cried,
But i just can't stop loving you.

Chorus:
Cause I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

But I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

Bridge:
I feel pressured,
Like there's something i'm supposed to do,
I feel lonely,
And i need to be back with you.

I feel pressured,
Like there's something i'm supposed to do,
I feel lonely,
And i need to be back with you.

Chorus:
Cause I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

But I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

Verse 3:
The invisible rope around my neck,
Stopping blood getting to my head,
My brain is a shattered wreck,
It doesn't matter cause i'll soon be dead

Chorus:
Cause I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

But I'm just your voodoo doll,
You stab your needles deep,
I can feel you stabbing,
Why won't you let me sleep..

This is sung to a slowish tune.

[hmmm60]

a bit ****

[Biancazzurri]

I liked the flow very much! The chorus and the bridge are so well flawn that I didn't noticed them..:)
Evernight and everyday i cried, - poor line imo, think more about it. I don't understand! Are you talking about lonelyness like here :
I feel pressured,
Like there's something i'm supposed to do,
I feel lonely,
And i need to be back with you.
Or about a real voodoo doll and manipulation like here:
The invisible rope around my neck,
Stopping blood getting to my head,
My brain is a shattered wreck,
It doesn't matter cause i'll soon be dead
What you think fits the flow isn't always the right thing to write.

Crit mine if you want:
http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?p=7475546#post7475546

[Gofix]

It's meant like that, it's about in the middle of two sides. Cause as well as being manipulated and feeling trapped by said person, at the same time i have a feeling like i need them, however bad they seem to be. The lines 'Everynight and everyday i cried, But i just can't stop loving you.' is supposed to show this; i'm in pain because of said person but at the same time, although i do not enjoy the pain, i need said person.

It's kinda hard to explain..i guess.

[Havelock]

It's got a good flow, and I like the vodun doll metaphor. 7.9/10

[PainKiller8191]

i like the vodoo doll metaphor but i hate the way u bring it out, it doesn't sound good at all, the flow is pretty good but i could tell u forced half this stuff out

[MonVie]

If people are impressed by the flow, I'm sure the fact that the verse-chorus structure being simple contributes good and proper.

If you feel like a Voodoo Doll, you'd better stay away from her.

[Gofix]

Thanks for all of your comments. I like the way that most of you like the flow, cause it's designed to fall off my tongue easily! On the 'forcing stuff out' comment, it didn't. I came up with a bit of it while i was taking a piss, and the rest just flowed out like urine out of my dick..err..yeah.