Kisses mistaken as love

[My_recovery_injection]

Kisses mistaken as love

Help me change, let me see only hate
Make me get over this lust
We met only in fate
All could have been avoided
I only wish that I had refused your love

Everything you put me through
Restless nights, which I’ve cried in darkness
My self-harm and self-pity
Hatred towards love, searching for trust
I blamed myself
I wanted nothing else
After all you’ve done I still want nothing less
Nothing less, nothing more but you

I didn’t care about the distance
All you had to do was ask
I would have been by your side
But you kept silent, and I suffered
I always knew you didn’t care

I still think about you
However…..

Everything you put me through
Restless nights, which I’ve cried in darkness
My self-harm and self-pity
Hatred towards love, searching for trust
I blamed myself
I wanted nothing else
After all you’ve done I still want nothing less
Nothing less, nothing more, but you

The longer our relationship lasted
My love grew stronger
But I didn’t know yours was fading
You always seemed irritated
I knew it was my effect on you

You said you would never leave me
That your love was strong
I guessed you lied
You had me convinced
How come you did nothing for me?
Why was I all to blame?
I did nothing but love you
Wasn’t I enough for you?
You’re missing out on something special
I have something to tell you
I've just realized
I think I hate you.


(My first ever song, dedicated to the c**t ex)

[The_One]

It's a cliched topic, but said in a different way. Pretty good. Not eye catching though.

8/10

[Witty Username]

I still think about you
However…..
I can't imagine you being able to pull off "however..." in a song. But more power to you if you are capable.

The song was very meh overall. It's good that you can vent, but I wouldn't suggest taking this any farther into the public than you have already.

[My_recovery_injection]

Well as i said it's my first song posted on this website so give me creddit for that.

[shadeddakotabassist]

first off just posting on this site doesn't really mean anything. sure you've come out and risked a beat down for your work, but anyone can do that. if you want credit for your writings, take the time to learn from what the crits say and refine your talent. Now to the crit...
Help me change, let me see only hate
Make me get over this lust
We met only in fate
All could have been avoided
I only wish that I had refused your love
Seems a strange way to open up a song. There's no intro to it and no reason for the change yet. The third line is totally forced rhyming. get rid of it. change it. I don't care. I just don't want to see it again. Fourth doesn't have any real purpose. You know what. forget this. the song topic is overused. the rhyming is pretty much all forced (well, what rhyming there is) there's no passion in your words and the pattern is hard to follow. 3/10. good try but I'm just not feeling it.

[bigskinny2006]

I'll second what shedalkajsdflkjbassist said, jumping head first into something leaves the listener wondering what the hell happened, sometimes keeping them guessing is good, however, in this case it's not, oh and something else that irks me, You can't avoid fate. later.

[A_Perfect_Sonnet]

Shaded Dakota Bassist,

say it with me. It's not shedalkajsdflkjbassist.
GOOOOD.