Like Hell We'll Go! (crit for a crit, a crat for a crat)

[FunknPunk]

We won’t lay down and die with our head in our hands
The presidential Lie is a-calling once again

Nothing can change us, no nothing can falter
Tear our trust between this war and another

We don’t like the Suffering, no we don’t like the oppression
But one more free world can’t replace a completed mission

There’s seven years of fighting there on the ground
Another seven coming ‘till our boys come back to town

[Chorus]
Though there’s hell to pay
Like hell we’ll go!
We’ll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

There’s nothing to change us
No nothing to conform
There’s not a chance hell that
You’ll take away our home!


Though there’s hell to pay
Like hell we’ll go!
We’ll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

Fourteen years of service
Don’t look good to me
A thousand more dead bodies
Is the price to be free

Hey hey!

(meh it's short. Y'gotta shout the last 'hey hey's too :o )

[espf-250htd06]

yea the price to be free but you like your freedom pretty good dont you i know i do. not a bad song acctually good flow, well worded i like it the bottom lines in the chorus could be better and i could stand to be longer good though 7/10 check out my song past desires

[FunknPunk]

thanks! :thumb:

Yeah I like my freedom, but in this I'm making a comparison between the iraqi freedom and our freedom...
(I'll check out past desires)

[FunknPunk]

*bump*

[The Næsebor]

We won’t lay down and die with our head in our hands
The presidential Lie is a-calling once again

I like this part, the wording in the first line is awesome. It gives me a great image to set the feeling for the rest of the song. This is one of my favorite stanzas.

Nothing can change us, no nothing can falter
Tear our trust between this war and another

This part isn't as strong, and the rhyming is a bit loose. However it still sounds good and gets people thinking a bit.

We don’t like the Suffering, no we don’t like the oppression
But one more free world can’t replace a completed mission

Again, the words aren't the most complicated, but they can convey a lot of emotion, a very strong meaning.

There’s seven years of fighting there on the ground
Another seven coming ‘till our boys come back to town
This stanza doesn't really do it for me, but it still works well with the rest of the song. I would suggest revising it a little, but keeping the general meaning.

Though there’s hell to pay
Like hell we’ll go!
We’ll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

The lines, "Though there's hell to pay, like hell we'll go!" are simply genious. Great lines, great message, great feeling. The next lines follow out the strength of this section.

There’s nothing to change us
No nothing to conform
There’s not a chance hell that
You’ll take away our home!

Again, these are simple words that hold a complicated message. I know I seem to be getting repetetive, but there's not much else to say.

Fourteen years of service
Don’t look good to me
A thousand more dead bodies
Is the price to be free

I really, truly want to love this section. On one level it's perfect, but on another level it needs some revision. Not the ideas, but the words. Just miniscule things to be changed that would round off an excellent piece.

Overall: 7/10. Great work :thumb:

[FunknPunk]

Bah feck you make me blush :o

Thanks a lot man! I'll revise the last line somehow :)

[FunknPunk]

We won’t lay down with our head in our hands <-took out 'and die'
The presidential Lie is a-calling once again

Nothing can change us, no nothing can falter
Tear our trust between this war and another

No --- More --- War <-this fits well with the bass line I came up with. Say if
No --- More --- War It's a keeper or not, please! :thumb:

We don’t like the Suffering, no we don’t like oppression
One more little lie and it’s a ****ed up nation <- changed this.
(used to be: But one more free world can’t replace a completed mission) which do you like better?

There’s seven years of fighting still there on the ground
Another seven coming ‘till our boys come back to town

Hey! We’ll all shout at sundown like it’s our obligation
Hey! We just can’t wait for the state of the Union

Hey! It’s all bearing down into my skull <-(blah)
Hey! Until our last bill of rights is annulled <- added all this on the spur of the moment: I know it's not as good right now but i'm going to change it :)

No --- More --- War
No --- More --- War

[Chorus]
Though there’s hell to pay
Like hell we’ll go!
We’ll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

There’s nothing to change us
No nothing to conform
There’s not a chance hell that
You’ll take away our home!


Though there’s hell to pay
Like hell we’ll go!
We’ll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

Fourteen years of service
Fourteen years of hate
Spit at the oppressors
until it's too late

No we won't lay down with our head in our hands
This is too much to take
We'll keep on fighting our own war
We won't do it all for the presidents sake

Though there's hell to pay
Like hell we'll go!
We'll keep on fighting
Out here on our own!

We all live
on a hate filled earth
But what one man hates
is not doomed to him by birth

There's only one man hating
One man making war
We'll keep on fighting
To even the score

Oi oi!


Lol I added a bit there, please say if it isn't as good :D
Thanks a lot people! :thumb:

[FunknPunk]

my band really likes it. FYI.