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View Full Version : an ode to A.P.S. - i own you.


xKONRADx
09-29-2004, 11:55 PM
AN ODE TO A.P.S.


Allusion to illusion, youre such a hoax

Pluralist to puritist
Even the deaf hear the holes
Regardless of that fact
Force your face to the podium
Exaggerate the exact
Contract and react
To make sure your face will stay afloat

Sexual to secular
Orgasms become so mechanical
Not withstanding your
Nhilistic characteristics
Echo the demanding, socialize your understanding
To turning faith to formulas

Bright and warm
Lonely but awake
Offering the choice of
Wearing a color of my own
Solely for my self

All but last, iconoclast



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i sense a level of subtlety ive never sensed before...

losererik
09-30-2004, 12:03 AM
Wow. I can't say much to do a thing to this. Not only is it VERY original, it is so unique in the way you approach your ideas that there really isn't anything TO say. Definitly a work of time and patience. Keep on writing, I don't think I'm worthy to critique this though!

losererik
09-30-2004, 12:34 AM
Oh haha, I didn't read the Jew Theory thing. This is awesome! Now that I understand the idea behind it. Way to go! Oh man, good laughs

losererik
09-30-2004, 12:35 AM
Sorry, Jewish theory, I don't want to offend anyone

basskid
09-30-2004, 01:13 AM
I like how the begining letter to every sentence lines up to form its own message
losererik-nice way to get out of critten by sayin your not worthy, ;)
just kidin :lol:

ana_rchy
09-30-2004, 06:09 AM
this is wicked! i've never heard of anyone talk about orgasms in such a blunt way lol. its very very clever, and v unique 9/10

Baodegoth
09-30-2004, 08:42 AM
very cool sh.it man.. not original cuz i've seen stuff like this on the forum but nonetheless..very good. the wording and imagery are amazingly well used. the 3rd paragraph however is kinda weak in comparison(sp?) to the rest..but overall i think this is great and it deserves an 8.5/10:thumb:

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could you please crit? thank you:
http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=245602

xKONRADx
09-30-2004, 04:12 PM
very cool sh.it man.. not original cuz i've seen stuff like this on the forum but nonetheless..very good. the wording and imagery are amazingly well used. the 3rd paragraph however is kinda weak in comparison(sp?) to the rest..but overall i think this is great and it deserves an 8.5/10:thumb:

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could you please crit? thank you:
http://www.musicianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=245602
really?! yeah ill check out that link..

PAID2makeGIRLSpanic
09-30-2004, 07:04 PM
What's A Perfect Sonnet? All I know is it's a Bright Eyes song.

A_Perfect_Sonnet
09-30-2004, 07:33 PM
its me, you jerk :(
the part that hurts most is everyone likes it

xKONRADx
09-30-2004, 10:40 PM
its me, you jerk :(
the part that hurts most is everyone likes it
you have to enter the challenge for sure now. if you dont ill be pissed
then ill spread rumors about you around mx, then youll have to get a new user name and youll be an imperfect sonnet.

A_Perfect_Sonnet
09-30-2004, 10:47 PM
you wrote it to make me enter the challenge? pfffffft, ill not do it just to spite you!

xKONRADx
09-30-2004, 11:19 PM
well then im going to enter one that disses subtle dagger instead, just to spite him AND you.

SubtleDagger
09-30-2004, 11:23 PM
And I'll give it a low rating.

Not out of spite, but because I would have anyway.

Permanent Solution
09-30-2004, 11:23 PM
heh...spite...starts with an s...like spam...:thumb:

xKONRADx
09-30-2004, 11:43 PM
And I'll give it a low rating.

Not out of spite, but because I would have anyway.
and ill give you a low rating. because you deserve it.

metaliq
09-30-2004, 11:45 PM
(call him a stupid head)

Ill crit your song in a lil bit. A bit tired now. :thumb:

SubtleDagger
09-30-2004, 11:46 PM
no u

xKONRADx
09-30-2004, 11:48 PM
no u
i just said i was going to. but thanks anyway.

Baodegoth
10-01-2004, 08:30 AM
really?! yeah ill check out that link..
yeah..there was a song with the same structure...i i believe it was made about someone in the forum...tho i'm not sure about that..it was a long time ago..btw tanx for input :thumb:

idontcarewhatyouthink
10-27-2004, 09:00 PM
interesting

A_Perfect_Sonnet
10-27-2004, 09:36 PM
why the hell would you bump this? ill request this thread closed please

Permanent Solution
10-27-2004, 09:38 PM
Hahahaha...stop whining APS, the kid bumped this for a whole new generation to enjoy...:thumb:

/Waits for Subtle to close

Of Kings and Men
06-12-2006, 04:09 AM
BumP! :lol:

tytothebenj
06-12-2006, 04:15 AM
WOAH WOAH. What's all this about?