Brocore: An Eye-Opening Report
by Channing Freeman
March 9th 2009 | 158 Comments
Over the years, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has featured many temporary exhibits in addition to its permanent exhibits, such as many of the features on the first five floors that d0cument the history of rock and roll. Some of these temporary exhibits have included Sparkle & Twang: Marty Stuart’s American Musical Odyssey, Cleveland Rocks: The Birthplace of Rock and Roll, Take Me Out: Baseball Rocks!, Mike McCartney’s Liverpool Life, HELP! Behind the Scenes of the Beatles Movie, Break on Through: The Lasting Legacy of the Doors, Vans Warped Tour, and even an exhibit on Hard Rock and Heavy Metal, which featured such heavy metal holy grails as Slash’s leather jacket/top hat and Ted Nugent’s loincloth.
After doing much research, it is my humble opinion that years from now, the patrons of The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame should make room for an exhibit called Brocore: The Lasting Legacy of Wearing Basketball Shorts and Nike Dunks to Shows.
But what is Brocore?
The answers vary widely depending on who you ask. In Webster’s English Dictionary, it is centered firmly between “broconomy” and “brocoski,” and the first definition given is “A form of hardcore punk, mostly made for males to engage in pseudo-homosexual activities.” The picture next to the definition is of Vincent Bennett, the vocalist for the band The Acacia Strain. He’s wearing a hat angled slightly to the left, wide ear gauges, and a shirt that says Johnny Cupcakes. But, as with most words, Brocore seems to have amassed a great number of meanings in addition to the definition in the dictionary. Like any intrepid journalist, I took to the streets to continue my research. I needed to find out what definition the general public would give Brocore, and somewhat more importantly, their opinions on the genre.
I went to my local Starbucks Coffee establishment, a well-known meeting place for bros. As I approached the outside seating area, it became apparent which groups consisted of bros. They occupied many of the numerous tables, looking like a Salvation Army clothes sale, buried as they were under layers of flannel and scarves. At a glance, it makes them look fairly intimidating, but when I looked closer I could see skinny legs poking out from underneath the upper layers like spindly T-Rex limbs wrapped in obscenely skinny jeans. Notebook in hand, I approached one of the tables, looking very out of place as I did so. I excused myself and wasted no time asking the various bros assorted around the table their definition of Brocore.
“Brocore,” said one of them, “is a style of music and a style of dressing. Originating in Northern California, the music is generally made up of breakdowns and is associated with hardcore. Also dinocore. The style of dressing consists of items of clothing such as camouflage shorts, basketball shorts, Levis, band shirts, baller caps, and Vans shoes. Gauged ears also go with the look.” The other occupants of the table seemed to agree with this assessment.
I was reminded instantly of the picture of The Acacia Strain’s Vincent Bennett that I saw in the dictionary. It seemed like so long ago; I have gained so much knowledge since then merely by asking this young man with earlobes the size of tennis balls what Brocore is. Then, someone from another table did the next part of my research for me. I had planned to ask detractors of Brocore why they hate the genre so fiercely, but a male teenager close by had obviously been listening to the conversation going on at the table I was occupying.
“Fuck that Brocore shit. That’s faggot shit. Yesterday I bought Stick to Your Guns, A Day to Remember, Beneath the Massacre, and Evergreen Terrace records and I fucking burned them in the barbeque pit in my backyard.”
One of the bros at my table stood to confront the outspoken teen, but his fellow bros calmed him down, and he returned to his seat. While the boy’s outburst was a source of anger for my newfound friends the bros, it was eye-opening for me. It is common knowledge for stalwart heavy metal fans that religious groups used to hold meetings for the purpose of setting fire to records by bands such as Iron Maiden and Judas Priest, two of the most widely regarded metal bands in the history of the genre. It appears that Brocore is off to a good start; could it be that in twenty years, certain Brocore bands will be regarded as classic examples of music mastery? These days, insulting Iron Maiden is considered blasphemy. Could that be what bands like Suicide Silence have to look forward to in the future?
While I certainly felt that my on-the-beat style of research had been effective, I wanted to find out if there were any major newspapers which had any information on Brocore. As luck would have it, Los Angeles Times writer August Brown had written an article entitled “The Re-Ascent of Bro Core” on March 24 of last year. In the article, he describes Pennywise as “the Socratic ideal of bro core,” and furthermore cites NOFX and Bad Religion as two more founding fathers of Brocore. As someone who was under the assumption that Brocore is a fairly recent phenomenon, I was surprised to find him describing this as a reawakening of a somewhat dead genre rather than the 2000s-exclusive movement that I considered it to be. He goes on to detail some of Brocore’s influences on mainstream bands, insisting that Paramore’s “That’s What You Get” has “a bit of D-Plan’s screwy odd-time math-core in it.” This last point left me somewhat perturbed; I was excited because I thought I had found information on Brocore from a legitimate source, but it seems that August Brown is anything but that.
Dejected, I confided in Sputnikmusic’s own Tyler Munro. I explained to him that I was at the end of my rope and in desperate need of something, anything that could sum up Brocore accurately and concisely. His answer:
“Brocore is a necessary evil. We need somebody to beat up wieners, and it gives everyone else someone to laugh at. Sometimes guys just want to go to shows, take their shirts off, get sweaty, and wrestle. And I respect that.”
That, I thought, was the key. Respect. I am reminded of the classic Aretha Franklin song of the same name. “R-E-S-P-E-C-T,” she wails, and somehow I can imagine thousands of bros chanting along with her, “Find out what it means to me.” I returned briefly to Starbucks Coffee, where the same bro who previously defined Brocore for me was still sitting at the same table. I asked him what Brocore meant to him in terms of respect.
“I’m not sure,” he hesitated. “It’s definitely a good question. I guess I just wish there wasn’t so much hate for the music and its fans, you know? But it’s whatever. I know that years from now, Brocore will still be around. It’s a revolution…it deserves respect, and I know I speak for many other bros when I say that we’ll never stop loving the music, because in the end that’s what it’s all about, right?”
|Entombed are long-forgotten to be one of the essential bro-core bands, as they inhibit so many of the movement's characteristics not in their music or dress, but rather with their lyrics.|
"Yeah, God is away
It's business every fucking day
You need to pray
I don't see you first
How does it feel
You wanna eat you gotta steal
Keeping it real
When you're about to burst
You wanna hurt me
You wanna bite my cock
You're gonna make me run amok"
|It's all about the brocore|
|Does bro-core apply to Agnostic Front, Madball and such? Or this crappy Suicide Silence stuff.|
|I could see myself brandishing a bandana and pummeling weiners to Katy Perry. But what would Amon Amarth be classified as, bro metal?|
|Nice job, too bad no more than 30 people will even know this feature exists. Someone convince mx that a feature spotlight on the top of the front page is absolutely necessary, pleeease....|
|ya and the comments show up as blank spaces in the comment section, and then when someone comments something else, it says that the person commented on that instead of the feature|
|Nice feature. I love the Channel-5 investigative nature of it. |
I guess this being the first feature since the new page made you the guinea pig for issues on the front page such as no descriptive text under your title, no banner, no real announcement that it was even posted (i.e. no movement to a more prominent position), and the comments are screwed.
|This feature certainly opened my eyes.|
Needs more Emmure though.
|brocore is a way of life you guys just don't understand|
|"I went to my local Starbucks Coffee establishment, a well-known meeting place for bros."|
so much lol
|"this young man with earlobes the size of tennis balls"|
i have no idea when this particular trend came to be, but i find it infuriating. and confusing. mostly confusing. intensely confusing.
i hate what it is that i cannot understand.
|Feature brings massive lulz. The MSPaint .jpg is the best.|
|The was informative as I had never heard of brocore before this fine piece of journalism. Now I know how to spend the next few months of my life. |
|about half of the people from my university are from Nor Cal, so is hitting me a bit too close to home.|
|haha mad shit.|
just lol, best feature ive read in a while.
|second jpeg rules|
also, too many things to quote and lol at
|the picture is just...stunning.|
amazing article brother.
|LOL... That was so good. I'm fed up with every d-bag with a slanted baseball cap calling me bro and wanting to bump chest. Thank you for shining a light on this growing epidemic !|
|Awesome feature. Sputnik needed something fun; it's been kind of dull around here lately.|
|WOW! that was hilarious! and very eye-opening|
|It's basically a report of all of the retards at the shows I go to! You left out hardcore dancing though :(|
|bring the revolution broseph|
|needs more My Chemical Bromance and Natty Ice|
|my eye barely caught this, but I'm glad it did. awesome read.|
|why do people leave the stickers on their caps|
|This makes me sad because one of my good friends fell victim to this. Now when he says "bro," he isn't kidding. He really calls people that. And he tries to tell me that bands like Enter Shakiri, Brokencyde, and A Devil Wears Prada are good bands. Meanwhile, he finds Opeth and Between the Buried and Me boring and repetitive. Go figure.|
I better go put on some Burzum.
|I was once a bro. That is, until someone showed me Cryptopsy. Once you're a bro, you make a real commitment. It's not an easy thing to get out of, you let all those bros down.|
|slightly more enjoyable than dfelon's norcal math rock report|
|I told a bro at the Uni I got to about this article and his response was; "Well if you're not with us then you can just get out get out get out get out get out get out get out!"|
|Just to clear the air here, i'm not a bro. I like me some Evergreen yeah, I like to wear sport shorts to concerts, and yeah, I like to wear headbands, but i'm not a bro alright. No starbucks, no wrestling,no fruity gatherings, and I don't wear any mother fucking tipped hats with ear piercings. Are there mother fucking snakes on the mother fucking plane? Because if so, i'm not a bro.|
|There aren't snakes on the plane...YOU ARE CLEARLY A BRO|
|don't deny your bro-ness wylie|
|I'd rather chop off my ding dong then admit that. You would rather chop off your ding dong then not drink? Yeah....Wowie....|
|i'm going to put a picture of you in this article wylie|
|this gets better every time i come back|
|Ha ah ha ha. I thought you were joking but I suppose not.|
|Regardless of whether he is bro or not The inclusion of that image of Balls makes this perfect.|
|this feature now has legendary status|
|That flat-screen in the back makes me totally bro. If only that flat-screen and that Nerf gun were actually mine then i'd be totally bro, bro.|
|Has anyone noticed that the All-American Rejects are becoming suspiciously bro? Like for instance, the drummer with his enormous ears, or the fact they have gang vocals in one of their songs?|
Just a thought.
|Wow Balls. You are so bro holding that Nerf gun.|
|Where did you get your headband from bro?|
|Thanks man, I take steroid injections and guzzle pure creatine shakes for breakfast. Before the roids I was 5'9 and 86 pounds.|
|whoa mcloskey is such a bro name & with sucha bro pic there aint much denying it broseph W|
|instead of changing your name to wyborn change it to wybron|
|Maybe i'll change my name to Rorschach or Gurt. A lot of bromance on sputnik.I would have though it was February 14th or something.|
|Best bit of investigative journalism since... wait investigative journalism doesn't really exist.|
|hey thebhro why don't you go suck an egg|
|Custis you tell the best stories.|
|Fuck Wyborn, Balls. Call yourself Broseidon, king of the Brocean.|
|"Call yourself Broseidon, king of the Brocean."|
|ugh wish i thought of that|
|Haha. I was scrolling down the page and thought to myself was that a nipple that just flashed past...and it was.|
|every time i come back here there's something better like nick greers nipple for instance|
|hahahahah this is soooo legendary|
|best thing on sputnik?|
|Another kid with a 'core' complex. |
|I can never tell if these are serious or not|
|the internets are always serious business.|
|Oh my, this is so much better than the original feature.|
broseidon's stance/aesthetic is priceless
|sweaty nick greer nip sent my bromometer off the charts|
|Broseidon, King of the Brocean reporting for duty.|
|I'm feeling irritated that DFel did not comment on this one yet, despite his counterfeit sitting in the feature as pic. |
Anyways, funny feature, that was a good laugh
|i think he's taken to pretending the feature doesn't exist|
|"Broseidon, King of the Brocean reporting for duty."|
|holy fuckin hell reading that was the biggest waste of time ever why does it fuckin matter to you how other people look or act and patrick warburton is a fag|
Better use a bro gun.
|this is in the most read i am so happy|
|lol, this article is so good. |
|wow i totally missed the new pictures. haha this made my day|
|most of my friends r bros. they're chill, they just listen to bad music.|
|I have that Evergreen Terrace shirt. :D|
|Bros meet at Starbucks? lol|
|I can't believe no one has mentioned this yet, possible the best investigative report on this appalling trend:|
|article needs more emmure|
|Funniest thing I've ever read in my life|
|holy fuck this is so good thanks to whoever bumped this|
|you seriously need to add the advert for the emmure boxing gloves to this|
|hahahahaha this is very good|
|Bumping thread. It's quite a shame that I used to deny my true broness.|
|we are all relieved that you finally embraced it|
|Once I came out of the closet there was no turning back. New Era caps, gym shorts and wifebeaters galore.|
|Crap, I wear 2/3s of that stuff :(|
|suicide silence is just shitty deathcore. no bro about it.|
|My breakdown brings all the bros to the yard|
|Damn, I almost forgot about this. Awesome shit.|
|my heart beats in breakdowns|
|oh my god i remember this|
remembering this so hard right now and loving it.
|Cryptopsy is garbage,|
Lord worms knows how to suck big worms.
Garbage band is garbage
|I remember the various stages of bro-dom that ive achieved and surpassed over the years.|
|i'm starting to sink into this fraternity bro stage|
|bump for a new generation of sputnikers|
|Years of pure unadulterated sputnik broness captured in one thread....it brings a tear to my eye. Far before the emergence of Intothepit and Frank Redhot. Good times.|
|it's weird reading this now because it was really before the explosion of calling everybody 'bro' this and 'bro' that. i like to think that bros were inspired by the picture of wylie and decided to try to be like him|
|Interestingly, where I live bros equal those metalcore/"screamo" fags without even knowing it making them an endangered species. |
|Hahaha I have a friend like this. I'll send this to him and put him in denial.|
|The term "Bro" is far too vague and oftentimes (rightfully so) in negative context. I don't like to align myself with the "other branch", those violent hxc goons and preppy fratboys. To me they defile the bro code. The bro ethics extend far greater than the shallow toolery of fighting and fycking. Unfortunately many do not understand that. |
|I'm good with it not having to worry about it due to it's subjective nonexistent state. |
|lmao I remember this, good times.|
|bromember this like it was yesterday|
|man is this what sput used to be like |
|yea interesting stuff right|
|Shout out to past self:|
Leave while you have the chance