First of all, I added a new song to our nifty Track of the Day playlist over there on the right. It’s “Wellington’s Wednesdays” from the new Weakerthans release, Live At The Burton Cummings Theatre. John K. Samson pulls a random kid up from the crowd to play a solo in the middle of the song and he actually does pretty damn good.
Alright, onto pressing matters. Here are some things that you guys need to stop doing:
1. Using the term “concept album” – You wouldn’t call a novel that tells a story a “concept book” would you? No. So why do we automatically throw the hideous term “concept album” onto any record that has themes or tells a story? People are calling the new Titus Andronicus album a concept album for Christ’s sake. Every album has connected themes, every song tells a story. You know why people call vehicle prototypes “concept cars”? Because they haven’t been fucking invented yet.
2. Using the term “pop-punk” – It’s not so much the term itself that bothers me, although it certainly does get on my nerves. It’s the fact that it’s gained such a negative connotation (similar to how people used to use the word “emo” a few years ago) that people automatically hold something referred to as “pop-punk” to a much lower standard, as if something labelled as such can’t be better than a 3 or 3.5. It’s especially annoying that the only thing that sets “pop-punk” albums apart from something that could be better labelled as “rock” is either the production, which is usually more polished, or lyrics dealing with relationships, usually in a juvenile sort of manner.
3. Ranking things – Lists have gotten pretty awful in general, but lists that rank things are the worst. Unless you’re going to rank the top 50 albums from a certain year or every single song that a band has ever recorded, just don’t do it. Does anybody want to know how you would rank the songs from a Dance Gavin Dance album? Nope. You would think that common sense would play a part here, but of course it never does. Additionally, these “vs.” lists need to stop. Dillinger Escape Plan vs. Circle Takes The Square vs. Converge? More like Apathy vs. Indifferences vs. Who The Fuck Cares?
4. Saying “[adjective] [noun] is [same adjective]“ – This one reminds me of something that people used to say a lot on Sputnikmusic and to some degree still do. If someone didn’t like an album they would say something like, “This album is so bad that I would rather stab myself in the eye than listen to it.” It’s even better when they throw a “literally” in there, because that certainly lends more believability to the statement, right? The reason it reminds me of that is because I have to try really hard not to say “Hey guys, when you say ‘bad album is bad’ it makes me want to take a syringe and shove it into my nipple.” I can’t imagine how such a horrible meme was started, but I guess it’s not surprising given the current state of the Internet.
There are probably a lot more things too but that’s enough for now. Give these things some consideration because I really do love you guys, which is why it’s hard for me to see you turning into such failures. In closing, here’s an AIM excerpt:
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:12:48 AM):||been thinkin about bein a porn star|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:12:51 AM):||do you wanna be my manager|
|Soliquidis (12:12:59 AM):||yes|
|Soliquidis (12:13:02 AM):||i can do this|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:13:09 AM):||hel yeah|
|Soliquidis (12:13:19 AM):||take it off|
|Soliquidis (12:13:22 AM):||all the time|
|Soliquidis (12:13:36 AM):||put yourself out there|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:13:45 AM):||anal is out|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:13:47 AM):||black metal porn is in|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:13:55 AM):||instead of corpse paint|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:13:59 AM):||we will have actual corpses|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:14:02 AM):||totally untapped market|
|Soliquidis (12:14:34 AM):||are you willing to have someone poop into your butt?|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:14:45 AM):||willing to do anything|
|Soliquidis (12:14:46 AM):||you gotta spread far|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:14:48 AM):||get my name out there|
|Soliquidis (12:15:08 AM):||gotta get a name|
|Soliquidis (12:15:13 AM):||hmmm|
|GDandBlinkfan76 (12:15:23 AM):||cuntstis|
|Soliquidis (12:15:26 AM):||lol|
|Soliquidis (12:15:28 AM):||nice|