But in the long run, it's only the work that pushes boundaries and provides an alternative approach to a familiar formula that's worth remembering. With Cold Mission, Logos smashes the familiar formula to a million pieces and carefully rebuilds it from scratch.
"familiar formula" is used twice here, i'd edit one out to avoid redundancy.
overall this is a really great review, man. i know you're looking for specific points i can make that would help your review out, but nothing like that would help you too much at this stage-- you already get how to write meaningfully about music, so there's not much more i can teach you in that regard.
i will say that sometimes you can pack a lot of descriptions into your sentences, which can be a little difficult to get through. it def isn't a major deal, though, just something you can think about in the future. i'll point out a few examples that could be cut down just a little bit, or reconstructed in some sort.
The synth-work seems to provide the obvious solace from Cold Mission's heavy silence, but it's the empty space itself and the dark, industrial rumbles that fill it which provide the relenting glue to hold the unstable track together.
these are all AWESOME ideas and I'd love to read them in more of a spacious manner if that makes sense. phrases like "the obvious solace" read a lil awkwardly-- do you stew over these types of sentences? i know that when I do that, my sentences read a little bit more forced. in such situations, it's good to just think "what's the main point i'm getting at here?" brevity is the soul of wit, some dude said once at least ;]
but really tho, good work. i think the best thing you can do for yourself is to keep up the writing, for i think practice will reveal the things about your writing that you'd like to hone over time. but you have a really fucking solid foundation here, and i'd love to see more from you. as Will said earlier, you should definitely apply for contributor here-- we could use more electronic coverage, and you do a swell job of reviewing it in a technical way that's still relatable.
Digging: Telefon Tel Aviv - Fahrenheit Fair Enough
Album Rating: 4.5
I suppose "the obvious solace" part sounds kinda like writing from someone who has the thesaurus handy. I actually feel like that part specifically gets my point across better. The negative space here really does kind of force you to look for something to hang onto, and the bright synths would be the obvious choice, but they end up being just as spaced out and off-kilter as everything else, and eventually you realize that the patterns in the space or small little rumbles/buzzes/bass swells are the only things that provide any sort of comfortable rhythm, more from desperation than anything else. Which is why I like "solace" specifically more than "relief", it implies that desperation aspect somewhat more (at least to me).
I do agree with what you're saying though, and there's probably a better way to write that than just those 2 choices anyway. And I definitely can make my sentences pretty dense, especially when trying to keep the review short (and trying to give an accurate picture of an album that's pretty different from the norm). I don't really stew over the sentences, I try to keep the writing as natural as possible while still being descriptive. But I do sometimes make changes when I think it gets my point across better when going back through my writing, which probably cripples some of the natural flow a bit.
I really appreciate you taking the time to look this over, the criticisms, and the kind words as well. And thanks to you too hiyabootchie.
Digging: Lucy - Churches Schools and Guns